Ang Weird Ko

April 3, 2009

With just a simple gesture or appreciation, a negative mood can turn into a vibrant one.

 I’ve been stressing with a lot of  things since the past few weeks and all I want to do is not to think about it. Things which could not really be issues are coming almost at the same time and they are getting worse and worse everyday.

I have so many things that I need to do but could not because of certain limitations. I take one at time, the first that needs to be deal with and leave the other which are less prioritize.

My sister is planning to enroll summer classes since it’s a priority to there school which I’ll shoulder and is equivalent to one semester fee. It’s so hard since I’ve been planning to spend my earnings to fix my computer and buy a new cellphone for myself, plus I’ll go out for a vacation with my friends. I’ve been planning to go to a trip to Davao, but I’ve been putting it on hold since I need to pay attention to what I should need to deal with.

My mother will undergo an eye surgery as soon as possible. Eveything has been taking care except for the lens that needs to be surgically implanted to her eyes. We would not pay any medical fees, but only for the lenses which cost not really that much, but would be impossible for me to save since I shoulder my sister school expenses.

I know that money problems are just every day problems that one person regularly deals with. For the past few days, I’ve been contemplating on how I am as a person in terms of skills and achievement. I am no achiever, I nothing to brag about in terms of my skills. I rather spend most of my time slacking than do what needs to be done. I reached this age without taking my life seriously but not leaving my responsibilities. This age should be the time for settling down, be serious and think things over, but I think I am still immature for that.

I am almost close to being despair but will take things normally. Just a simple appreciation with what I do would mean a lot to me. I realize that I am that kind of person when simple favors are done for me. Three of them happen today.

I came to the office 5 minutes before my shift when I suddenly realize that I forgot my ID. I cannot go inside and the receptionist at the front desk was no big help. I went home to get it and go back to office again. I was really touched that my sister follow my instructions to meet me downstairs to give to me my ID.

The second was when I was commended for my expertise with my work. I know that I am not that good in work that much, but I surely felt proud when it was acknowledge. I am more positive with my work now and look forward on how could I do better.

The last but definitely the most remarkable is that I was able to talk to talk to the person whom I considered being precious to my life. He’s still far away, in Germany and we talk about on when he was going home. That really made me jump for joy.